Quarter of a century makes you sound utterly ancient doesn’t it?
It’s no wonder then that the moment people pass the age of 25, panic about approaching 30 starts to set in. You’re now officially in your late 20s so it’s all downhill from here, right?
Well, no of course not, but that doesn’t stop you worrying that you are on borrowed time, your looks are on the way out and your ovaries are about to dry up.
Here are the biggest worries that rush into the minds of those who are 25 years and 1 day old as they start to really take notice of their ticking life clock.
1. I’ll never be a parent!
All your friends have adorable babies and you’re broody as heck. As the big 3-0 draws ominously near, you begin the unfounded panic that you are running out of time to have children of your own. The truth is, the average age to have a first baby in the UK is 30 so all of those friends that have beaten you to it in their twenties are just ahead of the game.
The average age to have a FIRST baby is by no means a deadline for when your time to have kids is up. So chill, and cancel that appointment with the sperm bank until you’ve thought things through.
2. I’ll never find love
Some ridiculously enviable people find their soulmate at school but that is rarer than you might think. Just because your friends are all loved up right now with bae and they look inseparable, it by no means suggests that you are running out of time to enjoy the same.
You might find your true love tomorrow, next year or in a decade. And by then, your mate who is oh so in love right now might be onto husband or wife number three. You just never know – love has no time limit.
3. I’m no longer cool
You’ve started to lose track of the cool kid buzz words (did you frown at your screen when I said ‘bae’ earlier?) and you’ve no idea who that band at number one is – what you swore would never happen is starting to come to pass.
But trends are fleeting and you’re not really missing out on that much by not being aware of OMI and Jess Glynne.
4. I’m stuck in a dead end job
‘I’m still stuck at this bloody desk and only the young, good looking college graduates get promoted!’ says your paranoid brain. In actual fact, on average, a career peaks at 39. So you still have plenty of time to wow your team leader.
5. I can no longer handle alcohol
It might feel like after a heavy night that this has been a sudden change but it’s really not. Every body’s ability to handle their tipples is different and, while it is inevitable that age is a factor in worse hangovers, it won’t take much of a lifestyle change to be back to where you were.
You can cope with one less jagerbomb, can’t you?
6. I’m gonna get fat!
Don’t feel too bad while chowing down that birthday cake – like alcohol consumption, the slowing of metabolism is very gradual so you don’t have to switch to salad leaves and water; just be ever so slightly more aware of moderation.
You aren’t going to implode like a puffer fish when you reach 30, honestly.
7. I’m still in debt!
Still paying off your uni fees? Maybe you still owe your mum a chunk for paying your first flat’s deposit.
Newsflash: you’re far from alone. There are estimated to be 9 million serious debts in the UK. Money is a tricky business no matter what age you are. There is no shame in not being debt free by 30. In fact, if you were, we’d want your advice on how you did it.
8. Technology is scary
The latest live blog from an Apple conference has left you baffled and you have no idea what the point of Tumblr is.
The fact of the matter is, keeping up with such things is not as vital to you as it was in your teenage years, where it was life or death to have the latest Ipod. As long as you haven’t started saying ‘in my day’ then you’re still good.
9. My looks are fading
Wrong. A study by Allure magazine found that women considered to be at their most attractive at 30 while for men it’s 34. So stop anxiously avoiding mirrors and embrace your beauty – it hasn’t even peaked yet!
10. I’m going bald!
The days when being bald was considered unappealing are long gone. Some of the most sought after men out there are follically challenged. 80% of men will go bald in their lives. 80% of men are not on the shelf. So do the maths and realise that having a smooth noggin is not curtains for your appearance.
And therefore it shouldn’t be for your self esteem.
11. I’ve not had any life experiences yet
Guys, just chill out. If you haven’t had that dream holiday, met that celeb you obsess over like or done a sky dive, then there is still oodles of time. The average UK life expectancy is 82 years old, with a great many living over a decade past that. What you’ve experienced so far is just a fraction of what you have in store.
12. I’m stuck in a routine
You get up, you go to work, you come home, you watch TV and at weekends you might go to the pub.
Routines are comforting but, during any mid-life/ pre-turning-30 crisis, they become a source of despair. Are you wasting your life? Well, no, humans thrive on routine and one person’s idea of boredom is another’s idea of joy.
Despite what people’s Facebook pages may say, no-one is partying 24/7.
The truth is, going past 25 should not be a milestone at all. Life is not a race and you can end up wasting those precious years you’re clinging to if you spend them worrying.
