by Funke Phillips-Emordi
There’s something about love that makes your tongue loose and it’s common in females. You’re oh so in love and you just want to shout it from the top of Mount Everest. You want to tell everyone that cares (and a good number of people don’t) how much you love your man, how good he is to you and how willing you are to die for him.
The same loose tongue makes you lavish the most ridiculous praise on your beau. He’s the best guy in the world (really?). He’s the best sex you’ve ever had (doubtful). He’s the most caring, gentle, handsome, generous blah blah blah. Let’s stylishly forget that you lavished these exact praises on your ex-beau until the relationship ran sour. In your defense, that was the past and this is the present. Ok o. We agree with you.
But, there are instances where your loose lips could put you in trouble if you aren’t careful. One of such instances is full disclosure about past relationships. Some girls are honest to a fault. They can’t lie to save their lives. I’m not saying you should lie to your boyfriend o ( I didn’t say that ) but there are some questions that the truth shouldn’t be the answer. When it comes to your relationship, full disclosure about your past is a wrong move.
Guys are generally nosy. Forget the fact that they disguise their nosiness and make it seem that ladies are more nosy, guys are definitely more nosy. They are just very good at hiding it. If you’re unfortunate enough to be dating an extra nosy guy, you have to be careful lest your loose lips don’t get you in hot water.
Your extra nosy dude would ask questions like ‘how many guys have you slept with before me?’ ‘have you ever cheated on a boyfriend?’ how good was your ex in bed?’ have you ever had a one night stand?’.
I know you want to be honest but I really do want you to think before you answer these questions. I mean, some of the questions are utterly ridiculous. Why does he need to know? Will it make your relationship better or stronger? I doubt it.
Before you throw caution to the wind and become Honest Hannah, you need to be remember that men are ego creatures. The only thing they want pampered more than their penis is probably their ego. So if you do anything to deflate this very fragile ego they have, you have a big red x next to your name in their book.
He’ll tell you ‘baby, don’t worry, just tell me the truth. I won’t judge you’. Do not, I repeat DO NOT fall for this statement, he WILL judge you not because he wants to but he simply can’t help himself. We are all human and we all judge in different ways. So don’t think your man is any different.
Why do you want to tell your boyfriend you’ve slept with over thirty men? Why? What does he intend to do with the information? He’s just being nosy and you should tell him so.
Obviously, there are some areas you need to be totally honest about like if you have a child with an ex, or if you’ve been previously engaged or married then he definitely needs to know. If he judges you because you have a child or you’re divorced then he’s not right for you and he isn’t worth your time.
But ridiculous questions like the ones I stated above don’t even need to be answered.
In every relationship I’ve been in, the only thing I want to know is why his former relationship ended. That is all. I don’t need to know how many girls he has slept with. He probably would lie if you ask anyway so why bother? The past is where it is – in the past. Don’t let it creep into the future and mar an otherwise beautiful relationship.
In the same vein, you don’t need to be Curious Catherine asking questions you have no business asking especially if you don’t want the same questions to be asked of you.
This article is culled from Demola Rewaju Daily.