#SoundOff: Why I Think Pastor Sarah Got It Wrong On Sex In...

#SoundOff: Why I Think Pastor Sarah Got It Wrong On Sex In Marriage On Twitter

By Charles Novia | Op-Ed Contributor on October 27, 2015
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Credit | Big Stock

A popular Abuja pastor, Mrs. Sarah Omakwu was trending a few days ago, somewhat all day with her series of of what I would personally call ‘misinformed and brainwashing’ tweets about some aspects of marriage sex in marriage.

Now, I usually give some pastors their spaces, being a Christian but I am not one to let some misinformation such as what she has tweeted ride because she is a ‘woman of God’. These are the things which make our society locked in the 19th century; a twisted sermon.

According Omakwu, who is senior pastor of the Family Worship Centre, ‘when you are married traditionally or in court (Registry), you cannot have sex until you are married in the presence of God. People who are married traditionally can consecrate their marriage in the presence of God’.

I suppose this means married in a Church wedding or marriage by a Pastor.

She goes further: ‘For a Christian, you are not married, until you are married in church.’

Then she delves into different sex styles ( I wonder how she knows about such!) by saying ‘it is perversion when you put your sexual organ in another person’s mouth or anus’.

In essence, she’s saying blow jobs are a no no and perhaps the ‘doggy’; even in marriages?

She continues; ‘Anything different from having sex with the right person in the right channel is sexual perversion.’

I guess she’s saying that sex should remain ‘traditional’; only stick to the missionary and just ‘do and go’ in a marriage.

She tweeted about some other sexual perversions but you guys can go check her out for more of that. I just picked what I thought were worthy enough to give my own to cents.

Pastor Sarah’s notion that traditional marriages are not marriages until the couple comes for a church wedding is at best a puerile slant of argument.

I do believe that when anyone wishes to get married in a registry in Nigeria; the first thing the registrar would ask is ‘have you both been married traditionally? If you haven’t please go and do it after this registry wedding soon enough. This registry wedding is for the country to recognise your union by law. The traditional one is for the parents and traditional institutions to bless and agree to your union’.

If the registrar is so inclined he or she will advice you to ‘thereafter go to your church or mosque for God and Allah to do the rest’.

When people like Pastor Sarah wake up and decide to go on a whim and try to redefine the traditional essence of marriage, with her followers lapping it all up, then there is cause for concern.

May ask her if during the time of the old testament, there were churches where the Jews got married? In fact, the Jews and peoples of the Bible of old had their own TRADITIONAL MARITAL RITES which had nothing to do with their Synagogues and worship centres.

Then, the other thing she wrote about sex and sex styles in marriages; I would like to agree with Pastor Paul Adeferasin of House on the Rock. I attended a HOTR Church Service in 2011, (not too sure of the year), where Pastor Paul was preaching about sex in marriages and said thus in my paraphrase, “If you are married and want to do the doggy, the missionary or any other styles you want to as a couple; I am not going to condemn you. Do it. Go ahead. God is not a voyeur to start judging you on how a husband and wife had sex within their union. I have looked at my Bible and I didn’t see anything in there telling us not to get it on the way we want to as husband and wife”.

I was one of those who screamed, ‘Preach it, Pastor’, breaking character, in that service amid my loud giggles and grins.

There was another pastor in one other service in another church I attended for a baby dedication of a friend or something a few months after, who preached about couples watching porn in their marriages as a sex aid.

He said thus, “Many of you couples in this church come to me sometimes for counselling. And I have found out that the problems of such marriages have to do wih sex almost 90% of the time. The wife would complain that the husband doesn’t touch her; the husband would privately complain that he cannot ‘do’ again because he’s not getting the right vibe. Many of the men tell me that they have to watch blue films to get erections before doing it with their wives. In fact many couples in church admit to watching blue films before sex. You know what I advise? If blue films are what will spice up your marriage e and save your union and make you both happy, please keep watching and keep doing o! As long as it is within your marriage.”

Is Pastor Sarah reading?

Charles Novia is an award-winning filmmaker. He is founder of November Productions and November Records. Connect with him on Facebook.

The opinions expressed in this article are solely those of the author.

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