by Jennifer Houston
Many of us are prone to compare ourselves to other people. Comparing yourself to others has its advantages and disadvantages. When you compare yourself to your friend or coworker once in a while, there’s nothing wrong with it, as such a comparison helps you become stronger, better and stay motivated to reach your goals. However, if you are constantly comparing yourself to others, it’s a red flag. From personal experience I can tell you that comparing will get you nowhere. You won’t live a better life and you won’t be happier. Comparing can ruin your life and you won’t even notice the reason why you are so miserable. Take a look at a list of the signs you are unconsciously comparing yourself to others and a few tips on how to stop it.
1. You dwell on your past
If you compare yourself to a previous time in your life and you believe that your past was better than your present and your exes or friends are happier than you are now, it’s a sure sign you are unconsciously compare yourself to others. First, your past was not as better as you may think now, and there definitely were hard times and problems. Second, your ex or friend may not be as successful and happy as you think. Don’t believe in illusion and stop dwelling on your past. Focus on your present and enjoy new happy and bad moments in your life instead of past ones.
2. You often judge others
The major problem of a modern society is that people become more selfish. We often judge others, we don’t respect people around us and think that we are better than they are. If you have a habit of judging other people, you should break it. It’s an obvious yet overlooked sign of comparison. You simply defend yourself and you are trying to boost your self-confidence by judging others. It’s a huge mistake!
3. You project your anger onto others
People who are constantly comparing themselves to others are unhappy. Unhappy people tend to project their feelings of anger onto people they respect and love. No, they don’t hurt them or make them unhappy. They just do it unconsciously. Start breaking your habit of comparing yourself to others with letting go of your anger.
4. You are constantly thinking about money
Are you satisfied with your financial situation? Do you want to make more money because your friend has a higher paycheck than you? You don’t notice those things you already have and you are not satisfied with your overall life. You think that your neighbors, friends, siblings and coworkers have a better life because they can afford to buy a new car, a new phone or expensive clothing. But, are you sure that they really can afford all those things? After all, they might have lots of debts and financial problems. Moreover, money will never make you happy, remember it.
5. You don’t love yourself
If you don’t love yourself, it’s one of the warning signs you’re unconsciously comparing yourself to others. Probably you often say something like ‘Your hair is more beautiful than mine’ or ‘You’re so slim and I’m so plump since I can’t drop those extra pounds.’ You should never ever say such things. Learn how to love your body, accept yourself and love yourself. You are special and you are absolutely beautiful no matter your age, weight and height. I don’t need to see you to write these words. I believe everyone is beautiful but in their own way. We all have flaws so no one is perfect.
6. You want to move out
If you want to move to another city because you can’t see and be happy for your friend’s success, coworker’s happiness or neighbor’s earnings, think twice. It’s not the reason to move out. First of all, learn how to love yourself. Once you accept yourself, you will give up on the idea to move to another city/country. If someone makes you unhappy, that’s one thing. But if you think that everyone makes you unhappy, that’s another thing. The same goes for your job. Don’t quit your job because of your coworker’s success. It’s not a smart thing to do.
Many of us are trying to stop comparing ourselves to others, but at the same time many of us don’t even know that we have such a bad habit. Comparing breeds insecurity and makes us miserable. Remember, no one is perfect. Stay grateful, love yourself and enjoy your present life. Do you think comparing yourself to others is a bad habit?