HILARIOUS! Man’s Writes Letter To Female Neighbour Who Has Loud ‘Rhinoceros’ SEX...

HILARIOUS! Man’s Writes Letter To Female Neighbour Who Has Loud ‘Rhinoceros’ SEX (READ)

By Metro UK on November 14, 2014
Woman writing a letter- Facebook
Man's letter of complaint to female neighbour having loud 'rhinoceros' sex
Click image to enlarge: The man wasn’t too pleased with his neighbour’s loud lovemaking (Photo Credit: reddit)

This guy’s annoyed because his neighbour keeps waking him up in the middle of the night with loud love-making that sounds like a ‘rhinoceros attempting to demolish a wall with a jackhammer’.

He was so perturbed he decided to write her a letter, which wasn’t too flattering, and then posted it on her door.

It started off pleasant enough with the man from Bondi, in Sydney, congratulating his neighbour for having a great social life and good looking friends.

Bondi, letter
Bondi is known for its easy going nature (Picture: AAP)

But this was just the classic building someone up before you take them down, which he did in a devastating way.

‘I do not wish to pry in on your sex life, apartment 12,’ he wrote in the letter uploaded on reddit.

‘However I do ask that before you mount Nick (or the rhino) I suggest you bolt the bed to the floor as so the rest of the beautiful residents here do not have to listen to your VERY loud, VERY short yet VERY annoying lovemaking sessions.

Rhino, Sydney
He likened them to rhinos (Picture: Corbis)

He was not finished there and added: ‘Let me give you a play by play. As I am asleep, dreaming of playing the perfect game of golf, I near the 13th hole, when suddenly I am awoken by what I can only describe as sounding like a Rhinoceros attempting to demolish a wall, with a jackhammer, whilst high on meth…and cocaine.’

After reading the letter we decided there was only one word to describe the author – hater.

He probably wished he could be in ‘Nick’s’ position, if the digs about his weight and sexual performance were anything to go by.

But after this letter we doubt she’ll even open the door to him.

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