Flirting is fun, flirting works, but flirting can also go very wrong! Whether it’s someone you know or someone you just met, nothing gets the message across to a guy that you are interested in quite as fast as flirting does, but as anyone who has dropped a flirting clanger before will know, when it goes wrong, it can go very, embarrassingly wrong. Even if you think that you have perfected the art of flirting, you should still read this post, because, here, we list out ten flirting mistakes that you are probably making and you don’t even know it.
1. Getting too close for comfort
The true art of flirting is to entice the guy, not to smother him! Don’t get too close, too soon, and don’t appear like you are clinging on to him for dear life. Guys like their own personal space and they like to think they are in control, so tempt him, tease him and flirt, but don’t be too clingy with him, or he’ll think he’s attracted some kind of stalker.
2. Keep it subtle ladies, subtle
Don’t go at it like a bull in a china shop; flirting works best when it is subtle. You can put a guy off when you make your flirting too obvious, so don’t try so hard and don’t go overboard. A light hand on his shoulder will do the trick, you don’t need to have your hand high up on his inner thigh to give him the message. Too much and you’ll scare a lot of guys away.
3. One guy at a time!
Even though we, girls, are quite good at multitasking, our next flirting tip for girls is to focus your flirting on the guy you are really interested in, and don’t flirt with other guys in the room at the same time. If he notices that you are flirting with other men, then the guy that you are really interested in will back off. You want to make him feel special and feel that you singled him out for your attention.
4. Don’t do all the talking
Some people get nervous when they are flirting and they start to babble on about themselves so much that the guy doesn’t quite know what hit him. You might feel excited and nervous, but you’ve got to give him a chance to talk too. It really is a big mistake for you to hog the conversation, so ask him questions about himself and give him a chance to answer you.
5. Never flirt when you’ve had one glass of wine too many
Don’t rely on the vino to give you courage to flirt with your crush, because that could very well lead to disaster. One drink to relax you is fine, but if you go over the top with the wine, you’ll go over the top with the flirting too. You don’t want to wake up the next morning thinking: ‘OMG, What have I done!’
6. Playing games
Men have short tempers and an even shorter attention span, especially, if they think that someone is just playing games with them. Flirting with a guy and then, pretending to not be interested and playing hard to get will definitely not get him interested. A little bit of playful teasing is OK, but don’t leave him with the impression that you are nothing but a tease.
7. Talking about the ex
Now is not the time to be moaning about how bad your life is or how bad your ex treated you. This is the time for light hearted banter and a bit of fun! If you start talking about your ex, he’s going to think you are on the rebound and that will certainly not endear him to you. Leave all your woes at home; they’re for another time and another place.
8. Acting helpless and dumb
Playing the dumb damsel in distress is another mistake that plenty of women make when they are flirting. Men do love coming to the rescue of a damsel in distress, but they don’t want to be with a girl who is completely clueless! Quite apart from that, he will probably see straight through the act anyway.
9. Giving everything away at once
Here is another one of useful flirting tips for girls – don’t give him your full life story in ten minutes either, you want there to be a little bit of mystery about you, so that he will want to find out more. You’re trying to lure him with little titbits of information about you that will leave him wondering and, hopefully, his imagination running wild!
10. Coming on too strong
As we mentioned earlier, subtlety is the key to flirting. It’s all about a hint of what might come and not an ‘in your face’ sexual advance. If you come on too strong, he could get completely the wrong impression about the type of girl you are and you might scare some guys off. He might even go and tell his friends and that’s how rumours and bad reputations start.